wet bee diary

Friday, May 04, 2001
Further to that post about Slovenia, I should mention that I have some pictures of beehives that will blow your heads off, but I will not post them here until this weblog achieves critical mass (if, indeed, it ever does)

and this:

"my boss's ex found a bee in her room. she attempted to placate it by assuminmg the identity of a bee, this she did by turning on the vacuum cleaner to create an authentic buzz."

Woah, check this:

"There's a tradition in Slovenija that you 'tell it to the bees'...what pisses you off that day, who's shagging who & where, what you got up to that you can't say in confession, your general gripes & gossip. Painting beehives is a national thing there, there's probably even a website on it! I did have a book that I found in Winchester called 'The painted beeehives of Slovenija' (I kid u not!) as I was deeply into bees too...at one point during my random stream-of -consciousness library experiences where everything I found seemed to be connected(know what I mean?). I was fascinated by a dream I had that the art studios were arranged in a honeycomb shape, so that each student would have their own space to work on each wall & more rooms would fit into the college as a whole. The hexagonal-room thing made perfect sense to me, but I never kept the beehive book as at some future point I thought I was probably going just a little bit too mad & looking too closely at things. Bees are very clever tho. I've seen 3 bumble-bees this month, one came into the kitchen but went outside when I talked to it & said it wouldn't want to live indoors. When I was a child we had 2 beehives & I thought it very relaxing to lie under one & watch bees buxx around & onto me. I could see their little legs empty when they left & full when they came back (people love pollen too, different sorts). Bees hum at avery relaxing pitch, wonder if it's om? They crawled all over my face too but never stung me once"

From my friend who does landscape gardening and irrigation:

"Been in very close contact with alot of bees recently.....bumble bee "varieties" there are alot of different sorts it seems! Have you ever heard the squeeks they make? very strange, All living in an old wall near where i am working. Not aggressive bees, just busy bees. nice. very territorial i think, each seem to have a specific hole they use to enter the wall...or at least some are not allowed in certain holes. Will be on said site for a few weeks so will watch developments and keep you posted. What is in the wall?? A Big fuck off horney queen, or what?? maybe they are solitary bees living in a communnity....is that like a contradicton??"

Thursday, May 03, 2001
my brother's breakthrough:

"I have a bumble bee in formaldehyde stored in a small bee sized flask on my lab bench. strictly speaking it is not wet. infact it doesn't even look wet as it is submerged, and you may have noticed that wet things don't loook wet when under water (or other liquid). I shall track down some sort of imaging technology soon and send you documentation of this fantastic development. what do dry things look like underwater?"

To which I answer - find yourself a water-spider. As for wet things not looking wet underwater, we are entering a semantic minefield here. I would say that an underwater horse, with it's mane flowing in the water currents as it paddles along does look "wet", but could only be said to look "damp" or "sodden" after it emerged onto dry land, assuming it did emerge.

From: "mybrother'sangryfriend"
To: mybrother@hotmail.com
Subject: Re: bees
Date: Thu, 03 May 2001 12:11:05 -0000


And while we're on the cutesy bees tip:
A Hello Kitty picture is shortly to become the new screensaver on my PC.
You can get bee-ed up too, here.

This is someone called Kristiana Lee Yao "in her buzzy buzzy bee costume":

My brother, biologist and philosopher:

"i have in my possesion a dead bumble bee. it was outside the canteen, it had been there since yesterday, but i didn't see it yesterday. this makes me think of all the bees that we don't see. especialy alive ones. there are more people alive than have ever lived. is this true for bees? are there more alive bees than there are dead ones. i don't think so. so why don't we see more dead bees. are there more wet bees than dry ones but we don't see them because they can't fly? there is more water than not water on the surface of the planet, so it would make sense for there to be more wet bees than dry bees."

This obviously raises the question of the deficit of dead and wet bees - where are they? They must be the bee equivalent of the mysterious "dark matter" that we are told could balance all the equations of particle physics and cosmology. Perhaps bees transfer to a different phase of being when they die or get wet, and we are surrounded by countless dead and/or wet bees. They could even be inside our bodies.

Wednesday, May 02, 2001
More American Christian cant - this time anti-evolution rhetoric...

"INSECTS. Among the incredible diversity of members in the insect world none are more pointing to their Creator than the bees. Born of a set of parents that possess none of the features or skills they will use. Yet from day one the worker bee serves its Queen with absolute skills. Never learned, never forgotten, innate and created by God. The woker bee sweats wax. As that vital substance is produced the worker slices, trims and fastens it into the honeycomb renowned for its perfectly engineered strength and utility. Where did it get wax generators, wax cutters, trimmers and a trowel to lay each piece in the right spot? From the God who made 'every winged creature'!"

The rest of this rant claims that the giant lizards and dragonflies were all killed by the flood. Let us not dismiss it out of hand, though - it does provide a lyrical description of why bees are skill.

This is from quite a scary ultra-right Christian thing from middle America:

"In the next few articles, we shall present more Satanic symbols which the Freemasons love dearly. We will talk about Pentagrams, the Circle, the Yin and Yang, the Serpent, assorted animals, insects, and the Bees with or without their hive."

Fucking mentalists - the whole site is dedicated to clumsily proving that Freemasons, Jews, the Chinese and anyone else you care to mention are all part of one and the same blasphemy against Christ.

Still seen no bees; am feeling quite down about this.

On the plus side, I found this beestung website:

which has lots of nice free music on it.

Monday, April 30, 2001
Then the Buddha spoke in verse as follows:

Verse 49: As the bee collects nectar and flies away without damaging the flower or its colour or its scent, so also, let the bhikkhu dwell and act in the village (without affecting the faith and generosity or the wealth of the villagers).

There is a cartoon called Mya The Bee in scandinavian countries and also in South Africa... I am going to have to look this up. She has a friend called Willi The Bee, who is a kind of nerdy little bee. They have adventures. My orange-haired friend used to have a toy Mya, and it had like a blond afro, because it was from the 70s.

My small orange-haired friend is here now. She has her mobile phone ringtone set to "bee". She freed a bumblebee on Good Friday. It was in a car, and she cupped it in her hands to get it out of the window - not realising that it could sting. It didn't sting. Then she went to a stone circle near Canterbury and thought about bees.

Sunday, April 29, 2001
Today I remembered that I should make reference in this diary to:
a) Honey To The Bee by Billie "Chazbaps" Piper
b) multicoloured rich pop-punk band and friends of the KLF Voice Of The Beehive

Nightmarishly cute haiku? We gottem!

bee sits on flower
buzz buzz bee sips sweet nectar
quick! next flower waits

Roberta Gibson

Here's a deep one, from www.danwinter.com - this fellow's brimming over with bee metaphors.

Honey carries the codes of the planets as they beam their energy to earth..

The flowers, being of the highest vibration of energy in the physical world, carry the codes of the geometry that interlocks with the paths of the stars..

The flowers then hold the information, and release it in their pollen and plant nectar..

Then the worker bees of the honey bee kingdom, graciously collect the sacred nectar and pollen which is the food of the worker bees and drones, which becomes the raw material for the queen making royal jelly..

A few examples of bee-warfare from http://www.chebucto.ns.ca/~ag151/bee_tidbits.html

first century B.C.
Appian 12.78 says defenders of Bithynian Themiskyra used bees against
Lucullus in 72

second century A.D.
Herodian (Book 3, chapter 9, 5-6) records that during the siege of Hatra
by the forces of Severus in A.D. 197, the citizens were making clay
pots...filled them with winged insects, little poisonous flying creatures.

When these were hurled down on the besiegers, the insects fell into the
Romans eyes and all the unprotected parts of their bodies; digging in
before they were noticed, they bit and stung the soldiers.

A.D. 500
Saint Gobnet of Ireland (patron saint of beekeeping there) used her bees
to repel marauding cattle thieves in ca. A.D. 500. Different versions of
the story exist; in one she changed the bees into soldiers and the beehive
into a brass helmet, which was subsequently kept by the O'Herihy family
for centuries.

Someone on a chat board I frequent, who has changed his pseudonym to the name of a Satanic Norwegian "Black Metal" singer, has been sending me loads of marvellous bee spirituality stuff, including several of the pieces below, and this, which is just great:

What is the secret of the bee? It is that the Chaldee word for a bee is DABAR which also means a WORD, thus the bee is symbolic for the Mediator, the Messiah and the Word of God, i.e. that which proceeds from the Father or, in the mystery religions, prophecies and utterances inspired by the devil. The bee is therefore the Antichrist, the counterfeit Word of God, and what it produces is the seducing lies of the devil.

No bees yesterday, even in my distorted imagination... today it's raining so am hoping that maybe I might see a wet bee at last, but there is not much of the day left now. I thought I saw a robotic bee on the cover of a drum and bass record on the Emotif label, but on closer inspection it turned out to be an ant.